So, today I finally bit the bullet and began grading my stack of research papers. I am averaging about 15 minutes per paper, and I have graded 18 of the 85 that were turned in. (Sadly, I have 91 seniors, and not turning in a research paper usually equals not graduating since the paper carries such a heavy weight.) Some of those 15 minutes have been pretty grueling, so I have been trying to keep some humor running throughout the process. I have been jotting down the ludicrous, hilarious, pitiful, bogus things that my students have been writing, and I thought I would share some of the best ones with you.
Now, before you think I am a horribly mean person, let me make this disclaimer: I love my students. They know that I love them. HOWEVER, we spent 6 weeks on this paper, and I covered every detail repeatedly--so much so that I felt like a broken record. Before you judge me too harshly, remember that I have spent about 4.5 hours drudging through these things. I have graded 5 "A" papers that I was supremely pleased with... but onto the goods...
"The author's attitude, stated or implied, is toward the subject."
"The way Chaucer's style was, it was amazing."
"Wordsworth received a good grounding for this classic poem."
"The type of style that Coleridge used for this poem was strangeness and awkwardness."
"Romeo and Juliet were basically two lovers at first sight--they went threw a lot together."
"All through his life he wrote, wrote, and wrote."
"On the other hand man versus nature is like when a dog appears before all of the jailors and prisoners."
"There are really only 6 main characters: Quasimodo, the hunchback of Notre Dame."
"After reading the book, many realize that it is suspenseful."
"This British Literature Research focuses on a poem. The chosen poem was chose, because it seemed easy to research a simple poem."
"This poem has a nine point five rating."
Comment on which one of these strikes your particular interest, funny bone, gag reflex... Well, I'm back to some more happy readings...