Saturday, August 05, 2006

"My kids bore me..."

This British mom is taking a lot of heat for writing this article about how her kids can sometimes bore her--Gasp. She writes that much of "mommyhood" is glamorized. I heard she wrote this in response to an article written by a mom who gushed over how perfect and wonderful motherhood is. What do you think about it?


Heather said...

Okay, as a non-mommy, I can't really say too much. The lady seems a bit selfish to me, though. I'm actually feeling a little sorry for her children. As I read down the page, there were actually a few things that struck me about how children are becoming narcissistic, which is probably true. However, I don't think that's due to the love and support of a mother and father. That's a bigger problem that's taking over our society due to a lack of values. However, I don't think you have to be a stay at home mom to be a good mother at all. It is wonderful if you can and choose to stay home with your children, but you can be a good parent and work (both my parents did it.) Now, I don't think you can be a workaholic and do it, either. It's such a fine line. You just have to figure out what works for you.

Tesney said...

Okay, so I heard her interviewed on the Today show yesterday and she sounded pretty selfish to me. I'm totally in support of women who can balance full time career/children...let me say that upfront. I don't think I'm cut out to do that, but if I had to I probably could learn to juggle everything. Right now my priorities are totally on my family, but that doesn't mean women who work don't have the same priorities...I'm just not laid back enough...too type A...which is why I'm only doing part-time work. I don't think this woman is wrong for wanting a family and a career.

HOWEVER, I think she is totally self-centered to think that interacting with her children and doing things that they enjoy is boring. I don't get it. Sure, the Wheels on the Bus song gets boring after the 40th verse, but the huge smile it brings to Clayton's face makes me want to sing it 41 times! I imagine that I will feel the same way about pee-wee football games, little league, piano recitals or whatever else he enjoyes when he gets older. She sounds more like she doesn't enjoy her CHILDREN than the ACTIVITIES associated with motherhood to me. It's hard to separate the two in my opinion. I mean, there will always be time for shopping and hair highlights, my child will only be young once. Plus, I can find time (maybe not as much as I once did) to still go to the hairdresser and the mall when I want to.

Whew! I'm off my high horse now.

Heather said...

Seriously, how could she give up precious time that she will never get back (like going to their little activities) for "personal" time while their nanny gets to see them grow up? It's sad really.

Jen said...

I think Helen is an idiot. Children are never BORING. LOL. Watching Teletubbies over and over again, or the same Thomas DVD, is *boring*, children are anything but boring.

I feel badly for Helen's boys. I think they will grow up and read this and have some issues with their mother, if they don't already have some.

This lady lacks imagination and thinks that confessing her inability to bond with her children equals celebrity. She needs a good kick in the head.

Just my opinion. ;)

Supabloggasuprememama said...

I know there is a delicate balance in motherhood. A healthy mom needs to feel that she has a fulfilling life, and has time to herself, in order to spend time with and fulfill her children. A selfish mom SHOULD feel guilty if she is neglecting her kids. You have a right to your own time and you should be selfish from time to time, but not to the extreme of subbing in a nanny to spend time with your kids or going to the park. Who doesn't want to go to the park??

Children are the most entertaining things in the world. I am offended by the word that she uses. They are not just objects in your life. They are a part of you, and you a part of them. They also reflect the things (very brilliantly at times) that you need to work on as a parent. Perhaps she finds her children boring because she herself is lazy and boring. Creative moms find ways, and if you ask me, the lady needs more friends if all she can ever talk about is so and sos class etc. I get together with mommy friends and non mommy friends because we talk about stuff child wise, but I also love talking about the other stuff in life. It's an outlet... aka what shoes i want to wear with which skirt like she said..
Hello. sounds like someone needs a blog...

Cristin Claire said...

Ok, so, as you know I am not a mother.... yet. However, I feel SO offended at this article! I am just steaming with anger right now! What a jerk! Listen lady, children were going to be such an inconvenience in your ever-so-important life, here's a brilliant idea: DON'T HAVE THEM! Children are a precious and beautiful gift from God! This lady is the most selfish and self-absorbed lady I have ever heard of! Those poor children! It's not their fault that they were born from such a failure of a mother, yet they will be the ones to pay for it now and for the rest of their lives. I can just imagine those two having to entertain themselves as children... never having a mommy who puts up tents in the living room for them to play in, take them to the park because it was too tedious, or sit through any of their sports games and cheer them on because she has better things to do like get her hair highlighted! I think her children should be taken away from her honestly.

I agree with Ashley in that there needs to be a balance between motherhood and having that personal me time, but seriously, there is a huge line there that shouldn't be crossed. I think it's funny that she says she loves her children and that the way she is living (totally putting herself and her life first) won't affect them when they're older. Lady, it's already affecting them now! They don't even want to play a boardgame with you b/c they know you really don't want to play with them!!! I'm going to pray for her but especially for those children!

Ok, sorry... just had to get that out.